So much more beautiful than you realize.
I’ve always addressed my daughters this way, I’ll often say “Hi, Gorgeous” or “Hi, Beautiful” (which of course they are!)
And I was struck several years ago when a friend overheard me and said, “I wish my Mom had just once talked to me like that.”
It was one of those feel good moments as a Mom, when I got to pat myself on the back for doing at least one thing right.
I don’t know about you, but it seems I’m bombarded by messages—both from outside in the media, and worse from my own bitchy inner critic—that I am most definitely NOT beautiful!
And my mom actually DID call me beautiful when I was a kid, at least sometimes.
But teachers, caregivers and other kids were much quicker to enumerate all my shortcomings. Which of course is the part that stuck.
So I’ve still struggled with feeling ‘less than’ for most of my life.
I’ve got a new practice now: Instead of grimacing and making snide comments when I meet my reflection in the mirror, I say “Hi, gorgeous!” (Or, some other variation of a positive greeting. Basically I greet my reflection the same way I would greet a precious loved one.)
Okay – so I do it as often as I remember!
My intention is to rewire some brain neurons here, and that means doing things a little differently. I’m learning to appreciate myself just the way I am—age spots, stained teeth, uncooperative hair and all!
What do YOU think? Do you believe you’re beautiful?
Is it possible to call yourself gorgeous?
If the very thought makes you cringe (like if you hear a mighty roar inside saying, “What a crock of bullshit!”), try taking a baby step. Why not at least try saying, “Hey, there you are!” when you catch your reflection? No bullshit there. And it’s a small step up from the critical grimace.
After a few weeks of just acknowledging your own reflection, holding off on the litany of critiques, you may find it easier to actually say something kind to yourself.
Consider it a scientific experiment. If you stick to this for a month or two, you WILL rewire your brain to believe in yourself and your abilities more.
But—no beating up on yourself when you forget! I blow it all the time still! Even if you only do it half the time you are rewiring those neurons. Those old patterns have dug deep trenches in your brain wiring—but you CAN dig new ones. At any age!
And I know, I know.. It seems so HARD. Dammit, this takes EFFORT. It’s so much easier to just slip back into the old way.
But, how many times in your life have you sweated and worked your butt off to reach a goal? You know how to work hard! And, when you think about it, simply shifting your attention and your words isn’t half as hard as the studying and pushing you’ve done to achieve or excel at all those other things.
It’s just different.
What if you really are worthy? What if you really are good enough?
How might might your life change if you saw yourself in the positive light of beauty? What shifts might happen? What possibilities might open up?
You’ll never know unless you give it a shot.<